I finally feel like I am starting to round the corner and get back to real. I have been doing allot of thinking about why I started this journey in the first place. I have also been trying to address the low self esteem and failure mechanism that seem to plague me. There really isn't a day that goes by that I don't question what the hell I am doing or why. So getting fit is really at the forefront of my mind. I struggle with telling people in my life (family and friends) that I am trying to make a change. I have said it to many times before to fail and return back to my fat roots. I am sick of all the questions, skepticism, uneducated comments, and doubt that I receive from certain individuals in my life. These are people that I can not just write off and walk away from cause I know they are just uninformed and they do mean allot to me. The only thing in their health arsenal is low fat, low cal etc (diet of the 70s - 80s). I have always struggled with being the topic of conversation or being the notorious "Wave Maker". I don't like it when my choices impact other peoples lives in what they view as a "negative light". I don't know how many times I have heard "Well, what can you eat then??". With that snyd frustrated air in the question because my choices are impacting their pizza feed/ processed carb bomb. Then if I don't eat or say anything they think I don't like their food or that there is something wrong. Then compound that into a never ending cycle. Many of my friends are genetically gifted and don't really need to watch what they eat or drink so they think what i am doing is outlandish and weird. I have seriously looked them in the eye at times and said "would you want to be fat like me?". Then the bull shit comments about "your not fat" or "your too hard on yourself" start up. Who are they trying to kid? I am sure as hell not falling for it. I just really hate the fact that some people never have to work on being in shape. They just don't understand and cannot relate. Their hard workout is a f-n walk in the park for me but yet I am a big fat ass.... I don't really know what all this means but I think its all coming to a head. Something has to give and its not gonna be me saying "I am genetically fat so I might as well get used to it". F that, it's such bs. I know allot of the paragraph above is me being a whiner or excuse beaatch. I also know that the majority of you probably experience the same things and some how managed to make it. I also know I need to just commit to it and let everything else fly out the window.
Diet is planned and good today. I did a interval variation last night that I came up with on the A workout Billy was doing for a while. I don't think I was in good enough shape to really do the T-nation workouts effectively. So I took a few of the big moves and added a few others etc. I am pretty soar today and I didnt puke which was nice. I weighed in at 226 today and that sucks!
16 comments:
Well man, that's what we're here for. We understand your plight, even though certain people in your life may not.
Remember part one of Self discipline?
Acceptance.
You need to accept the fact that your body is the way that it is for 2 reasons: 1 is that your genetics might help you gain weight easier than others, and 2 that you've made unhealthy choices in your life.
There's nothing that can be done about 1. So let's focus on 2.
I've been obese most of my life, and I always thought that's just the way I was. Then I woke up and broke out of it.
It can be a lonely journey sometimes, but you need to have confidence you are doing the right thing. I kind of enjoy doing my own thing and knowing that it's right, even when other people are ignorant. It makes me feel like I have a leg up on them, even though I may have a harder time controlling my weight than they do.
Anyway, focus on the good stuff. The people like us who are here to help and support you, and the ones in your life who do the same. If they're not supporting you? Who needs them. Not that you have to write them off completely but just don't let it get to you.
All you can do is do what you know you need to man. We're with you all the way.
Now, enough talk. Let's get it done Rip!
You know what? Sometimes you just have to put your head down, keep your mouth shut, and keep doing what you're doing. You cant always explain to be people and people always seem to have an opinion and they want to share it with you. You can listen and nod, but then go back and do what you're doing.
Don't listen to anyone else but yourself and like i said, you know what you're doing, so keep doing it. I had to be told that a few times and I'm glad I kept to my laurels.
I know what you mean, bro. Thankfully my family are really supportive, but I've had some issues with friends and my girlfriend regarding my eating choices. After a while it stops being an issue and you just get accepted as the guy who does that. Oh well, if that's what it takes.
Also, your friends might look like they're in shape, but be completely un-fit. That's why I like to use fitness goals and personal records as a better measurement of fitness than the scale or the mirror. If you can get to a high level of output in strength, endurance, and speed, the looks will come with it. That's also the way that you can stick with it (instead of dreading exercising, you can embrace it as a challenge each and every day). If you do that, you'll always have a new challenge, one more hill to climb, and you'll never stagnate.
You're definitely not alone, man. Everything you said I relate with - that was maybe a bit more powerful than you realized it to be.
Speaking from experience, you can only do one of those things - one is to just fall back into old habits, and the other is to defy the odds. To me, you seem like a person who is going to take the second route.
Just do what you've got to do, man. It ain't easy, that's for damn sure. For guys like you and me, this is going to be a struggle to the end. As long as you never stop moving forward though, you never lose. Fight for it - it's worth it.
Hey, I'm with the group on this one . . . keep your head down, shut your mouth and power thru. Sometimes it's hard to justify your food choices when people are accustomed to seeing you eat a certain way. My co-workers swear I only eat vegetables, but I realize people see what they want to see, and really I/you are the only ones having to deal with our extra pounds. I do what's best for my health and forget everyone else, eventually they'll come around. Also, I think people know that my food choices are not open for discussion.
I don't know what happened to my original inspirational response . . . oh well, keep you head down, keep you mouth shut -especially around people that do not support your quest and power thru.
My co-workers swear that I only eat vegetables but I realize that people only see what they want. I/you are the only ones that have to deal with the feelings of inadequacy or low self-esteem because of weight and in that light, I'm all about doing what's right for me.
Also, at this point I make it known to folks that my eating habits or dietary choices are not open for discussion.
Don't worry about folks, keep your goals crystal clear in your mind and work towards it, people will eventually come around. At the end of the day, it's about your feelings, your body and your piece of mind.
Hey Rip. It does sound like a bit of a fix that youre dealing with but you have to just put your head to the grind and get it done.
These same people once they see youre making strides will eventually back off. Get it done Rip and let that speak for itself.
Here for you :)
Rip,
I know this sucks bro, but only you can do it. If they don't understand you can't make them, but you have to work through it. I know it can be rough sometimes when people say stupid things, but just push on. Do the right things, you'll clear the 220s and keep right on going. But you have to keep focused.
I finally found your blog. You kept commenting on mine, but I couldn't find yours. I got it bookmarked now so I'm here to support ya.
The best advice I can give you is just do what you gotta do. Visual progress is one of the best motivations and rewards when losing fat...plus it will shut any naysayers up. How can you question someone when they are getting results? The catch with this though is that I think all of us here KNOW what we need to do to get the job done, but it is applying the effort to do it is the hardest part.
I agree with all of the above. I stopped saying "I'm trying to lose weight" and started saying "I'm trying to get healthy to live longer"
And remember what Geoff stated...your friends and family may look fit but even thin people have diabetes and high cholesterol. They may learn something from you.
Your blog name says it all..."Learning to Live"
We all want to look better but aren't we all trying to get healthy and live longer and better lives? It isn't all about being on a diet or weight loss goals, which people we encounter in our everyday lives seem to think.
The true goal is to live our lives to the fullest. And when you're overweight and unable to take a walk without stopping for breath you aren't exactly living a happy and full life.
When people tell me I'm not fat I tell them my doctor thinks I am.
I agree with all of the above. I stopped saying "I'm trying to lose weight" and started saying "I'm trying to get healthy to live longer"
And remember what Geoff stated...your friends and family may look fit but even thin people have diabetes and high cholesterol. They may learn something from you.
When people tell me I'm not fat I tell them that they're not in the shower with me in the mornings.
That gives them a visual you usually have to pay $24.99 for. =)
How's it been going Rippers? It's the end of the month - hope you're hanging in there. Even if you're not - keep us updated!
I agree with all that's been said. I also think it's important to think about whether long-term damage will be done by you opting out of certain food options or outings, or having to deal with friends and family who don't understand what you're doing. Probably not. They love you and will be there. But, there is long-term damage to be done to your body if you yield to that discomfort. It's temporary, to a certain extent. I mean, you will always eat differently, but when you have gotten to your goal weight the interactions will change because people will see that you accomplished your goal, and you will be able to eat a little more flexibly.
Hey Rip!
How is it going? Hope all is well.
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